I was stirred awake at O’Dark Thirty on April 1st by my loving husband. He was touching me gently and whispering “We have a problem” That wasn’t what I wanted to hear as I first awoke. But then I remembered it was April Fools Day. I was going to go along with his joke. It makes him feel good.
“What is it?” I sleepily replied. “Well, I went to the bathroom this morning, and the toilet clogged.”
“Go on.” I knew he was just going to pull my leg.
“I had to get out the plunger.”
Nothing new there I thought to myself.
“But the plunger wouldn’t work. I kept trying, but nothing was happening. Until something happened. But it wasn’t what I wanted to happen.”
He doesn’t sound like he is joking. I’m beginning to worry a little.
“Then I saw it. The sewer was backing up into the drain in the tub and the shower. I checked the other bathroom, and it is backing up there too!”
I am now wide awake. WHAT? Is this an April fool joke?
He replied with a big fat NO.
“Exactly.” He said
I would now look at the clock to see what time O’Dark Thirty is, but of course, all of our clocks in the bedroom are covered (see an old post for more details). “What time is it?” I ask.
I wondered who we could call this early. I want to get up and clean my teeth, go to the bathroom, and shower. But I can’t. We have no drains. We have no usable tub or toilet. This day is not going to be good is it?
We reach our friend and neighbor but he has no snake. We call our nephew, but he has no snake. Hubby has to get to work as do I or we could get in real trouble. With this economy you don’t want to be late. Luckily our nephew knows someone who can come out right away. The cost will be $140, but we don’t care. We just want our house to stop smelling like a human litter box.
Ed’s friend from Castle Plumbing arrives and snakes the outside drain and the world is right again. Thank you Ed Skillin. The man with a plan.
I get right to work cleaning the showers, sinks, bathtubs and any other area with bleach so we can brush teeth, shower and get to work. YEA!
You would think that this would be enough crap for the day. But it wasn’t.
After a nice lunch with a friend I go home as my stomach wasn’t feeling quite right. I barely make it home before I get ill with diarrhea. Yippee. Once I get over that problem, I leave the bathroom and find the cat had diarrhea too. All over the floors.
Really? Is this April Fools? It must be. Perhaps I’m still asleep and I will wake up at O’Dark Thirty to none of this. Please. Please. Please. Please. I try willing myself to wake up from this day. Nuttin. It wasn’t a dream, but it was definitely a nightmare.
Happy April Fool’s Day everyone.